Monday, November 17, 2008

Eat Me: Indefensible Food

There are recipes in Kenny Shopsin's Eat Me that I'm convinced he only included to show off how contrarian and bohemian he is, how unconcerned with all our prissy, bourgeois rules of diet and tastefulness. Go for it, Kenny! I'm never going to make your chicken-fried hamburger, but I admire the spirit.

That said, last night I cooked something only marginally less horrifying: Shopsin's taco fried chicken, which sounded like an exotic twist on chicken fingers, the favorite food of my younger child.

Here's how you make taco fried chicken: Take chicken breast fillets, dip them in a mixture of heavy cream and eggs. Roll them in crushed tortilla chips then deep fry in peanut oil. Serve with a sauce made of equal parts Tabasco and melted butter.

Got that? Poultry dipped in dairy fat, coated in crispy fat, fried in liquid fat, doused in spicy fat. 

Quite tasty, but I hold crass junk food to a higher standard of deliciousness than I do steamed broccoli. I have tried calculating the calories in taco fried chicken and am stumped by how to account for the oil absorbed in frying. Supposedly it is less than one might think, but who knows. So I'm going with the intuition of one who has been dieting since Herman Tarnower recommended dry toast and lamb chops. My guess: A serving of taco-fried chicken is roughly equivalent to one-and-a-half amusement park corn dogs.

Corn dogs are better.

5 comments:

  1. Not to mention, that sounds like WAAAAAY too much work for something so blatantly yuck....

    ReplyDelete
  2. holy cow! if you continue this madness i fear the family and children's service folks may come take your kids away.
    you must stop this madness!
    (having said that, i'm now fighting an urge to run by the nearest kfc for a quick bucket).

    ReplyDelete
  3. Stay the course Tipsy.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am so excited to see your blog and end up at ground zero in my jumps. Much obliged to you to all you spectacular bloggers for doing thissnobby, common principles of eating routine and elegance. Let it all out, Kenny! I'm never going to make your southern style cheeseburger, yet I appreciate the soul.So, the previous evening I cooked something just barely less shocking Shopsin's taco seared chicken, which seemed like a colorful wind on chicken strips, the most loved sustenance of my more youthful kid. Here's the means by which you make taco seared chicken: Take chicken bosom filets.

    Regards,
    best essay writing service

    ReplyDelete
  5. الشغل على الصيانة الدورية لشبكات الاستبدال الصحي المتواجدة داخل البيت، بحيث نمنع التسرب منها حتى لا يجذب الذباب إلى داخل منازلنا. الانتباه بالنظافة الشخصية، والقيام بكافة الأفعال الصحية التي ينصح بها الأطباء المختصين في ذلك الميدان. بيانات عن الذباب لقد اكتشف العلماء العديد من الحقائق والمعلومات عن الذباب بحيث إنّ بعض تلك الحقائق تثير الزهول والاستغراب، ومن تلك الحقائق والمعلومات استعمال الذباب في الدواء، فقد كان بعض الأطباء في القرن الزمن الفائت يستخدموا اليرقات التي ينتجها الذباب في تنظيف الجروح والإعانة على التئامها على أكمل وجه، ومن الحقائق أيضاًً عدم امتلاك الذباب للمعدة التي تستخدمها جميع الكائنات الحية نحو هضم الأكل، فلذلك يقوم الذباب نحو الغذاء بإفراز بعض الإنزيمات من جسده العاملة على إذابة الغذاء وعلى ذلك يقوم الذباب بامتصاصه إلى الدم على نحو مباشر، ومن الحقائق ايضاًً عن الذباب أن قلب الذبابة يدق ما يبلغ إلى ألف مرة في دقيقة واحدة.
    شركة مكافحة حشرات
    شركة مكافحة حشرات بابها
    شركة مكافحة النمل الابيض بابها

    ReplyDelete