Friday, May 21, 2010

So much for the goat brie

Yesterday, we bought a second goat, a gangly Nubian beauty named Pastry. She stepped into our yard, glanced around, started yelling, and did not stop. If one of us left her side, she chased us, ears akimbo, and shouted. All night she screamed. Depending on the hour, she sounded like a wounded elephant/angry donkey/dying man who's lost his wits. If we lived in the country, we would have ignored her. But we have neighbors, we like our neighbors, and we were mortified.

I spent the night in the hutch to keep Pastry hollering once every few minutes, as opposed to once every few seconds. When I tried to leave, she ran around the yard in the dark, bellowing hysterically. I emerged from the hutch this morning with straw in my hair and cloven hoof marks on the sleeping pad. I smelled like goat and I'm sure I was peed on. It was one of the worst nights of my life. 
At 7 a.m., I dragged Pastry back to the minivan and drove her an hour north, back to the gracious 4H girl who sold her to us. Pastry is a fine goat, but she is not the goat for us. I came home and took a shower and put on a dress. Sometimes you only know your limits when you pass them.

12 comments:

  1. Have you read the blog Goat Berries? It's about raising goat and I have a vague recollection of one of the goats having similar attachment issues. You might be able to get some other good information there too.

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  2. Oops, sorry, forgot a link: http://goatberries.com/

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  3. did the mini house goat have any interactions with Pastry?

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  4. I'm so sorry. On the other hand, this is the funniest thing I've read in a long time!!

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  5. Valerie -- Thank-you for Goat Berries! She had something to say about this very topic.
    Anonymous -- Yes. Pastry head butted Peppermint repeatedly. That was okay. I would have kept her but for the yelling.

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  6. You are a good goat mommy. Really. That's heroic. And it puts my Woodstock II experience in perspective.

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  7. i can't believe you spent the night in that house with a goat! you are amazing - crazy or courageous - i am not sure which!
    I am so sorry. Can you try again?

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  8. Now see, this is why I love Tipsy. She spends a night in the goat hutch, and we all get to read about it from the comfort of our bleat-free homes. Sorry that Pastry was the wrong goat for you (will you still try for another?) but she made for a great story!

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  9. ROFLMAO!!! Oh, heavens, woman, that is some EXCELLENT POWERFUL writing! I'm sorry about the goat-capade issue, but thank you for the morning laugh! I'm going to share this with my entire family - THANK YOU FOR WRITING IT!!! Best, Ida

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  10. Georgia Jewel5/22/10, 7:38 AM

    Thank you for sharing your horrible, yet hilarious night with us. I can totally relate!

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  11. rotflmao :-D

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  12. Deja vu:
    http://tinyurl.com/y48bqod

    I'm glad the 4H girl was "gracious."

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